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February 05, 2010

Dark clouds above my head


I'll probably be like REAL SCREWED if i'm caught using the computer this late at night (it's one!). Everything is just so messed up, I wish I could start all over.

It's true, when there's something you don't like but you can't do anything about it, you very well change your attitude about it. There's no use complaining, and I'd really hate to yanzhengzheng see things like 'disintegrate' when I didn't even make any efforts to try to salvage it.

(Terrible english, sorry.)

I keep telling myself the same thing, over and over again, but it's like when I finally 'see the light', another blow has to fall on me, and there is a limit to everyone's morale.

Isn't there?

I realise it's really important to not take things and other people for granted. The labtop I'm using now, not everyone has one to use. A caring family (albeit naggy parents), at least they are concerned.

Even the contact list inside a handphone & a handphone number, losing the SIM card is a hell lot of trouble. (I would know, the next time I visit Popular, I'm so going to buy a proper telephone book made out of paper, not microchips..)

I just have to think how things could have been worse, and be thankful for what I have at present. Sounds really difficult, but it's what I would have to make do for now. (Obviously they could have been better, but let's not think about it..)

And obviously I NEED to push myself back on track. JC or IP, it's still two years spent in vjc, and it's a privilege no matter what. If I'm going to carry on with my half-hearted spirited-ness, life will probably most definitely continue to suck.

Because what you don't give, you don't gain!

And I don't want to look back, envy those who succeeded and ask myself, 'Why didn't I even try/ put in more effort?'. Regret is one of the worst feelings anyone can have.

-Ok end of my (self) motivational talk, hahaha.-

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